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Monday, May 7, 2012

Kiss my tush, TGFWofC

I write to you live from Xiamen, China... as with all blogs hosted by blogger, whereiscat is blocked by Chinese censors. Being IT illiterate, I never thought one day I'd breach the Great Firewall of China, but this day has come. It turned out the VPN icon was smacked in the middle of my laptop and I did not know.  *Blush*, although it was not as heroic as I would've liked, it was a victory nonetheless. So pucker up, TGFWofC, and kiss my tush! Yeah, right there.
Anyhoo. After arriving, I headed to the closest mall to get some water and snacks ... when I got there, I looked left ...
and right...
Down...
And straight ahead... WTF? I flew like 10K miles and I am in ... Kansas?
I walked back to the hotel, holding a 2 buck sun umbrella I bought at walmart, when in Rome be like Roman women and avoid the sun at all cost.  Just as I thought China was becoming bland and boring like the Midwest (no offense MidWest) and filled with giggly teenage girls from well to do families who swarm the cosmetics counters at Watson's, I passed by some street vendors frantically scurrying away from Chen-Guans (city inspectors who are more like bullies), if they get caught, they'd likely lose a week or a month's earnings, a man dressed in unkempt clothing holding a scavenger bag, he had a little girl with him dressed in equally dirty clothes, a family of Muslim Chinese sitting idly in front of their empty noodle shop, what brought them all the way from the dry highlands of northwest China to the opposite corner, humid and near tropical Xiamen? and eventually I stopped by this mom and pop Guilin rice fen restaurant.  Well, don't you think it looks like a bowl of noodle soup?  When I tried to order these "noodles", the proprietoress quickly corrected me, these are "mi fen" (rice fen) not mian (noodles)... whatevers, to this Shanghainese princess, all stringy floury thingies are noodles, and all non-Shanghainese cuisines are ... country bumpkin cuisines, including French :P

23 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yeah. Suck it, TGFWofC! -J

Cat said...

Yeah, TGFWofC, did you hear it from J? SUCK IT! :P

Anonymous said...

Very cool. so disappointing that you can't find any local cuisine and a bunch of commericalized , national chains found in the states. you're probably just in a nice area . go to the poorer parts and you'll find the good stuff.

Eugene said...

This post was just awesome LOL!

She-Hulk said...

I concur. :) I like angry and snooty kitty!

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